Over the years, I have learned that I have a pretty high pain tolerance… both literally and figuratively. For better or worse, God gave my husband a wife who can function under a pretty decent amount of pressure or busyness.
About once every 5 years, I hit my wall. Sure I have minor meltdowns in between, but I am talking about the ones that have a ripple effect. You know what I mean.
Last week, I not only hit the wall, I think it hit me back. The perfect storm of back to school, gearing up for fall ministry, knowing several people close to me were walking through painful times, parenting ick, and just running a home all seemed to collide. I literally typed up my notes of how miserable everything was so I could tell Chris when he got home. You can imagine how happy he was when he arrived home. The poor guy heard me flood and flood some more. Even good things were looking bad in the moment.
Why do I share this? Because of the next morning. As I entered into my Priority Time, God had timed what I would see in such a way that I knew He cared. Here is what greeted me:
We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies. (2 Corinthians 4:8-10 ESV)
I was feeling afflicted, perplexed, and struck down. I had allowed my mind to entertain the enemy’s thoughts. I was giving more weight to the enemy’s lies than to God’s perspective. I had lost sight that God knows as believers on mission that we will be afflicted in every way but He will protect us from being crushed or destroyed. As bad as I felt, the truth is that God has carried me through every trial in my life. He has never let me go. When the enemy roars around me, He never leaves me to my own defenses. He knows that my strength is never enough. If only I would remember that and lean on Him. He is our refuge, our safe place, our strong tower.
Perhaps you feel like the walls around you are closing in. I encourage you to remember God’s protection. Here is the cool thing… even when I lost perspective, God still cared. As I had my priority time that day, three people text me to say they were praying for me. They had no idea I hit my wall the previous night… but God did. He knows where your wall is, too.